We live in a glorious age: Bridesmaid dresses no longer need to be sickening sweet pastel poofballs, and they no longer need to be all match-matchy. What a time to be alive (and get married)!

With that said, there is more to it than just telling your gals to go and find whatever they want. That unstructured shopping scenario will undoubtedly result in something you don’t want. I would never tell you to “Just act like your in love” or “just do what feels natural” while giving you posing direction, because what does that even mean? How do you do that? Everyone needs direction and clarification; they are not mind-readers.

But fear not! You can easily achieve amazing results by setting a few parameters before setting your bridal party free:

1.) SET THE LENGTH

Before anything else, make it clear what length you want each dress to be. This is one part of the dress that should match, so decide for yourself what length you would like and communicate that thoroughly.

2.) PICK A VENDOR/DESIGNER

If allowed to go whoever they want, you might end up with dresses from all over the internet. This is not a problem, but there might be subtle issues that become apparent after it is too late. I have seen this most commonly with color. Not all blacks, navy blues or burgundies are created equal, and we don’t see how different one is from another until we’re all lined up for photographs and there is nothing that can be done about it (not even in Photoshop). If you want to give your girls a little extra help, tell them where you would like them to shop or give then a specific designer’s name, as this will give them a little more focus and create a bit more consistency for you. Tell them they have to come from Show Me Your Mumu or David’s Bridal or someplace else, and that will take out a ton of the headaches that can come from their independent dress shopping.

3.) SET A DELIVERY DEADLINE WAY IN ADVANCE

If your girls are responsible for getting their dresses on their own, set a deadline that is two to three months before the wedding. Nothing is worse than still waiting on one dress the week of the wedding—that added stress doesn’t do anyone any favors. Make then get their dresses here ASAP so any concerns can be addressed while there is time.

They are doing you the honor of standing with you, but remember it is still your day. It doesn’t make you a bridezilla by giving them a few parameters when it comes to bridesmaid dresses. 

On Mondays we educate! Check out the blog every Monday for a new post to help you plan your wedding your way! Find past posts here!